Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Time Is Love

There is a popular country song that croons "Time Is Love."  It is a hard song to understand if you have never been one to sacrifice achieving your goals for yourself, let alone for anyone else.  I never had a social life in high school, in undergrad, or even now, as I work on my M.A.  I don't really have any hobbies or talents that I foster outside of school, neither do I have any friends that I see on a regular or even annual basis outside of school or work.  Indeed, my life is devoted to success, both financial and educational.

However, the Hubby has forced me to realize that while I may be a selfish person with time when it is just me, I must make sure that I am not such a person where he is involved.  It is not fair to ask someone to commit their life to you and then to ignore them completely as you work on other goals.  Now that my goal of getting married to the Hubby has been achieved, having a successful marriage should be a new goal, probably one of the most important I will ever attempt to reach. 

Divorce rates in this country have reached an all-time high, nearing or now at 50%, and that is in large part due to the fact that most people are more willing to spend time planning a wedding than they are working on their marriage.  Statistics true even within the realms of Christian believers, who once held much lower divorce rates than the general public or of other predominate religious groups in America, it does not seem that even faith in God or the idea of a covenant marriage makes the difference anymore on whether or not one stays together.  We have all become people established outside of our relationships, and we seem unwilling to compromise.  I see this as an arrogance, that we believe our individual life is more important, our separate interests should take dominance when we merge lives.  How wrong we are, and how beautiful it can be to give.

The Hubby and I went on our first real date in months the other night.  Not that we don't go out to dinner often, but we did so this time with no homework, no work emails on the phone, no third wheel friend, and no rushing through dinner to get home to attend to any of the assorted above.  We simply sat and each enjoyed the company of the other.  I had forgotten how good that felt.  As our anniversary approaches, I am glad that I made a vow long ago to always take off around that time of year to celebrate my marriage.  I usually end up working all Valentine's Day and night, my birthday, Halloween, New Year's Eve and Day, but I have always and will always make sure to reserve that special time of year to celebrate when we got married.  It has taken me until I am 23 and two years married, but I finally understand that time is truly love, and while I can always work towards success, these days and hours and moments with my Husband, or with anyone else that I love, for that matter, cannot be regained.